20 April, 2014

Imagining beyond being - Expendability

As I wrote the introduction, I did not realize that I was writing just that - an introduction. Hence the title update now. Little did I anticipate that I would come to follow it up with quite a heavy dose of life lessons. But the difference between that introduction and this follow-up is the difference between two worlds - one of imagination and the other of reality. The situation here is the choice between the reality shaped by the thoughts of consequences of the imaginations if they were to turn real, and the reality that happens by itself. After all, it is one thing for an imagination to become real, and quite another for reality to happen by itself, unaided by any sort of imagination.  How many of us have had the true pleasure of saying 'I imagined I would live this way'?!

The following is the result of yet another battle of mind and heart, and the overarching and unyielding determination to go beyond rather than just stay being the being, no matter which one wins. It is in all ways defined by the motivation to break from being the being and become the beyond. And if I have to come to realize anything since that first thought, it is this: It is not impossible to go beyond the being, only just too difficult, at times, to hold on. But the point is to hold on. And the conclusive lesson is this: If a fellow being who knows he/she can be beyond, too, along with you, but still refuses to break free from the being for reasons whatsoever - society, insecurity, fear - it is not your fault. That is the reality that happens to them. If your reality is shaped by your imaginations, you cannot reconcile that with the reality that just happened to them. The logical thing to do is to let go and just move on your path to beyond. People leave. Simple. To rise above mere mortals, it is inevitable to break free from them! And that is how it often becomes a solitary journey. Here's to mutual expendability; you to them and they to you! I may probably leave you with the feeling that I sound like an anti-social, but I'm not. As I said in the introduction, I'm only just better off without the society. I don't raise slogans nor do I hold banners of protest against this damned society. There is nothing sacred in fighting something in the middle of which you yourself are. Instead, I think it is wise to be invisible to that very something, and make your way through it unnoticed and finally break free. (Paradoxically, I'm very obvious with this statement, am I not?!)

Most often, it is the society which keeps the being prisoner, and clips its feathers of hope to fly away to the beyond. And my latest experience is fully borne from this fact. Many people who should have mattered to me for life (and sincerely did at some point!) - some friends, other social gangs, and most of all, the women any of whom could have been my woman - all proved me wrong that I could take them too to beyond; and all of them preferred being the being. At best, I have tried to give them the elixir of imagination-driven reality, but they just wouldn't drink it! They have sided with the reality that happened to them, or worse, that they brought down on themselves. The infinite vicious darkness called society is just not the ground where I can take these beings head on and convince them of the possibilities of the beyond, and ask them to join me in overcoming the distasteful, dispirited, unambitious society. Looking back from the eyes of their society, they have all played their cards wisely. One more frog to the damned lot in the well! Good for them, and good for me!

For the pitiable souls (myself one, at some point in the past), it is awful to see how easily the society belittles something as significant as the motivation that once made them near-impossible to be held back in bondage. One of the reasons must be the fear instilled in them of becoming meaningless when death stared right at them and asked them what they made of their lives. I think many beings are slaves to the society because they are slaves to time and death, and the resulting fear of an imminent failure to state the meaning of life, should either time or death cut their journey short and make them answer to the society's question of 'the purpose of life'. The beings have a cause for the future, while the beyonds have it in their present. In this confusion, the beings do not understand that the beyonds seek a meaning starting now, as they live, which could only prove right in the long run. Even if death were to stare at them for an answer to the purpose, the beyonds have made right by the very ambition to start creating that purpose. As much as I have seen, the beyonds live, whereas the beings are always preparing to live!

That said, when I knew at every stage I was taking one step closer to the beyond, my beings could not understand. Looking back, I thank them all sincerely. For, as I said, the beyond is not the opposite of being, but the absence of it. Now I realize that the absence of that common lot brings meaning to my solitary journey. Still, I have not given up the ambition, or the over-ambition so to speak, that someday I will take, at least, one being to the beyond with me. To win that heart, I have an unrelenting spirit, an elevated spirit, of envisioning a beyond, far far away from the being. And when we start on the journey to create wonders, we will propose one toast to the expendables!

To the best of times!

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